Do you feel like your life is a mess? Is nothing quite working out the way you thought it would? Do people you thought you could rely on keep leaving you stranded?
Have you asked lots of questions, but nothing is showing up how you expected it to? Do you feel like everything is falling apart? If so, ask "What if falling apart was falling together?"
What if all those things you've been working on 25/8, bleeding sweat and tears, were still works in progress? What if the universe was rearranging things is a way you can't yet imagine? What if the mess were simply mid-creation?
Before you decide something is not working, stop and ask "What's right about this I'm not getting?" and "What will it take for this to turn out better than I could ever imagine?" Then smile an enjoy the creative process.
Do you consider you're addicted to something? Has someone told you that you are? What is that for you? Food, drugs, alcohol, sex, work, helping people, the wrongness of you, or something else?
What does addiction mean to you? That you're powerless to overcome it without submitting to a higher authority? That you will never overcome it and it will always control you? That it's a physical condition, an allergy, and the only solution is a long, slow process and complete abstinence? That you are bad, wrong, or a failure for having it?
What if addiction wasn't what you thought it was? If you've tried everything and would like to find out what else is possible, start by asking yourself "What if addiction wasn't a disease?"
What else is possible? That depends on you. This question is designed to unstick you from where you might be stuck.
How much change would you like? Visit Marilyn Bradford's System of Right Recovery for more information about how to choose for you.
Have you ever been in a workout, class, meeting, event or project where someone was trying to get you to do something? How did they do it? Were they aggressive and coercive? Did they browbeat you until you got it? Did the literally scream at you COME ON PUUUUUUSH!!!!
Even if you're in labour with child, how do you feel when someone screams at you to 'PUSH through the pain/deadline/brickwall'? Do you feel like doing it? If you're having a baby, nature will take its course. If you're not, are you like to PUSH, or are you likely to respond 'hmmm, maybe not today...'?
Do you do it yourself? Is breaking the pain barrier fun? Do you like banging your head up against the brickwall of obstacles? If not, and you'd like another way to generate results greater than you could imagine, trying pulling.
So if you'd like to create something new, ask "What if I pulled instead of pushed?" then pull energy from everywhere in the universe through you.
Play with it and see what happens. Maybe you'll spot that the wall is only a meter wide and you can walk around it. Maybe the unstable foundations of the roadblock will start to crumble. You can also pull energy through other people, then watch them wake up and get going. No screaming required.
Do you have a great new job that everyone is proud or envious of? Are you working on a project you believe has a higher purpose or great value? Have you me The One? Is your being, body, heart, mind and soul buzzing with orgasmic pleasure?
Or not? Do you have a sense of heaviness, constrictive breathlessness, or overwhelm? Are you stressed? Is your body suffering? Have you put this down to 'new job/ project/ relationship pains'?
Would you like to experience more ease and joy in life, including with any new additions like this? If so, ask "Am I creating my life for the joy of it, or something else?"
When you create your life from the joy, everything sings: your heart, mind, and every cell of your body and being. If you sense a part of you in not singing, destroy and uncreate anything you have made significant and ask "What could I be doing differently to create more joy?"
Then smile and play and find what brings you real joy.
How often do you say 'because' every day? For example: I can't come tonight because [I have to work late]; I have to work late because [it's a job and better than nothing]; I'd love to do something else more fun for work, but I can't because [add your reason here].
Are the things you say after 'because' real? Or are they simply all your reasons and justifications for not doing something? When you really want something, do you find a way to create it, no matter what it takes?
If you'd like to create more of what you'd really like in life, notice every time you say 'because' and ask "What's possible that I haven't considered?"
You're not wrong when you say 'because.' If fact, you're absolutely right and that's what you'll create.
If you'd like something more than you currently have, questions will open your eyes and show you what else is possible. Then you can create it, if you choose.
What's going on in your life right now? Is it fun, or not so much? How often do you complain about things? Do you have something you'd like to change?
Great! The fact that you see things you'd like to change means you can see change is possible.
So what is it about change that is causing you to keep complaining, and not change? What keeps you from creating the changes you desire?
Have you decided the change you'd like must be hard, and that you don't deserve it, or that someone else knows better about what is good for you?
Would you like a different possibility? Then ask yourself "What if change were easy?" and destroy and uncreate everywhere you have consciously or unconsciously decided it must be difficult and/or up to someone else.
What if you thought of change as an exciting new adventure? Would you choose it, and choose it again? What else could be possible for you if you embraced change and took action for yourself?
Do you find yourself doing things you'd rather not? Sometimes even doing things you know are not good for you?
Do you do them because you've been told that not to do them would be shameful, that you'd be guilty of causing harm to others, or that you'd regret not doing them?
Are shame, guilt, and regret real and true? Or are they simply interesting points of view based on someone's view of right and wrong? Words designed to control you and coerce you into doing what other people want, while distracting you from creating the life you'd really like?
Other people will always try to get you to do stuff their way, using words to trick you into believing it's good for you.
If you'd like to be free from the control of distractors like this, ask "Is the thought of shame, guilt or regret distracting me from creating the life I'd truly like?" Then see how light you feel.
You may end up choosing to do exactly the same thing, but not because someone tricked you into it. It will be your free and conscious choice.
What generative energy, space and consciousness could I be today that would create the life I desire with ease and joy?
How much effort do you use to create the study, work, business, relationships, and life you'd like? A lot or a little?
Do you think creating what you'd like must be hard work and controlled, take time, and come with trials and errors, ups and downs?
What if, instead, you could create like elegantly? Elegance is the greatest result with the least effort. Would you consider that cheating? Or being smart?
If you'd like to generate your life with greater ease, everyday ask "What generative energy, space and consciousness could I be today that would create the life I desire with ease and joy?"
This will remind you to BE the energy of your desire, and will unplug you from the push/pull entrainment of the world around you.
Then you simply need to be willing to perceive, know, be and receive what the universe shows you. Are you willing to be that aware?
Are you a parent, or thinking about growing some kids?
Do you feel like a beach ball on the ocean being battered by waves in the middle of a storm of advice? People telling you what you must/must not do to be a 'successful' parent? And if you don't, UH OH, your poor kids...
Does this help you smile and enjoy being a parent, or potential parent? Or not so much?
What if parenting wasn't what you thought it was? What if it could be whatever you chose it to be? What would that be?
Try this on for size. Ask yourself "What if my job as a parent was to be joyful?" What would create more joy for you as a parent? Acknowledging everyone else's points of view as interesting, then asking "Does this work for me?" and creating your life based on your own awareness?
What if the greatest gift you could offer your children was to show them the joy of life and living is whatever they choose it to be.
Think of the last time you were in a class, meeting, workout, or family gathering. How did you feel? Tired? Drained? Bored?
Were you dreaming of a good lie down, yearning for some chocolate (or something stronger), or wondering what on earth you were doing there?
What were your students, teacher, boss, co-workers, trainer, coach, family or friends doing? Were they smiling and joyful, offering expressions of encouragement, support and understanding? Or were their brows furrowed, their faces blank or glued to their phones?
Do you sense the energetic difference between someone who smiles at you and tells you "Yes, let's do this think! Great going!" and someone who looks serious or glum and tells you "No, not like that. Do it right like this!" or someone who never looks up from their phone?
Next time you find you're in a situation like this, ask "What energy could my smile contribute?" If you sense it could create change, then smile. And if you sense that they won't choose to change, then you can always smile and walk away.
What if a smile alone created more joyful energy in your life? Would you choose to smile even more?
What do people around you talk about? Do they gossip and talk endlessly about the next instalment of the trauma and drama in their, or other people's lives? Do they usually focus on who did what bad thing to someone else? Or maybe they talk about hair, makeup, furniture, renovations, drinking, sports, cars, or some other 'desirable' objects?
Or course there is nothing wrong with these things if they're fun for you. So do you enjoy it and join in? Does it make you feel uncomfortable or get you down? Or are you simply puzzled why people spend their time talking about things like this?
If you're not enjoying the conversations around you ask "What do I enjoy talking about?" and notice what comes to mind. If you realise what you enjoy doesn't match what people around you are talking about, simply acknowledge it with "How interesting I don't enjoy this." Then gently extract yourself.
If you can't immediately remove yourself from the conversation, a smile, a nod, and interesting point of view energy will take you out of resist and react. What if by not engaging in the talk, you changed the conversation?
And you can always ask "What will it take for more fun people to come and play?" and find people who are more in your zone.
Have you found someone special, who you absolutely adore? Do you wake up smiling about them, wondering when you're going to see them next, or being excited to tell them something?
Are you thinking about marriage, hoping they'll pop the question, or waiting for the right moment to ask?
What are your hopes, dreams and fantasies about getting married? Do you hope it will create something in your relationship that you don't yet have? Does it give you a sense of security and stability? Or do you consider it a great excuse for a party, and to say to everyone you care about "Hey, look at us! We like hanging out! Come and celebrate!"?
Perhaps you're uncertain about it? Do you have people in your life telling you how good/bad it is? If so, and you'd like more clarity, ask "What does marriage mean to me?" Notice what comes to mind. Have you made marriage the answer to something? If so, you might want to ask another question.
What does having children mean to you? Have you ever said "I'm never going to have children" or "I don't think I'd be a good parent"?
What does parenting mean to you? What have you decided being a parent has to be? Have you based that decision on what your parents, friends, relatives, neighbours, 'experts', or the media have told you?
Do these expectations about having children and becoming a parent feel light or heavy to you? Are you stressed or conflicted about what to do? How is this impacting on your relationships with your insignificant other?
Wht if you could create a different reality for you as a parent? A reality that was light, exciting and joyful?
If you'd like to find out, ask "What if being a parent wasn't what I thought it was?" and destroy and uncreate everything you have made real about what other people have told you.
Then get clear on the energy on the life you'd really like and see where that leads you.
Right now, who in your life are you doing your best to help, support, love, care for, work hard for, or contribute to?
Do you get the results you know are possible? Or are you saddened, disheartened, disappointed, puzzled, upset, frustrated, annoyed, or even angered by how little impact you seem to be having? Are they treating you like rubbish?
Who do you make wrong? Them, or you? Do you re-double your efforts and go out of your way to do whatever you think is required, to no effect? Do you feel like rubbish?
If you'd like to create a different possibility, ask "Have I made this person greater than me?" Then acknowledge how great YOU are, regardless of what others would have you believe?
What if no one were greater? What if everyone were just different, including that some people simply won't choose change, no matter how great you can see it could be?
Would you be willing to be the greatest you are first? And then invite others to come play?
Has anyone ever been angry with you to try and distract you from seeing what was true, either so you wouldn't see it, or so they didn't have to look at it?
For example, when you question someone because you sense they were lying. Did they get angry or indignant and say things like "I can't believe you are questioning me?!" Did that make you angry?
Do you get angry when people say things about you that aren't true?
One useful thing to know about angry is that it can indicate a lie. So next time you feel anger rising, ask yourself "Is there a lie spoken or unspoken here?" You will know. And if you'd like more clarity, stop and ask the other person "What do you mean by that?" Then listen.
Asking questions in the face of anger will move you from the auto-response of reaction, to the freedom of action, so you can create what you'd really prefer.
Have you had a bad day...week/month/YEAR? Did you bump into someone's parked car when you were backing down the driveway? Did you get a bill 10 times what you were expecting? Did youfind out the times had changes on an event you'd been promoting, an hour before it was due to start? Did you create a fight when you thought you were being helpful? Did someone tell you how much rubbish you are? did you have ALL of these in one day?
Do you feel like crying? Having a stiff drink? Jumping off a cliff? Something else?
If you'd like something else, ask "What's right about this I'm not getting?" Then ask "What would make me giggle right now?"
Remember when you were five, and everything made you giggle? Find ONE thing and pull that energy through you, and keep looking for MORE thinks, until you lighten, smile...and maybe even giggle. Even if it's to giggle at yourself for being Cute, Not Bright.
Do you encounter many angry people in your life?
When people do anger, are they ever really interested in hearing your point of view? Or is their main focus getting a reaction out of you? Are they interested in you being free to say and do what you prefer? Or are they looking to control you?
You know the exact moment your buttons are pushed and you become trapped in emotional reaction. Would you like to be free of that auto-response? If so, next time someone does anger at you, be Cute Not Bright. Stop and ask them "OK, what do you mean by that?" and listen.
Keep asking the same question and listen until the anger has gone.
Anger is a distractor people will use against you to see how you'll react, so they can find a way to gain control over you. Acknowledging the other person like this will take you out of reaction, and into action and enable you to create the life you'd really like.
Is your priority in life to help people? What do you like about helping people? Would you like to change the world? Do you know that, with your support, some people could create the change you'd like to see? You're not wrong.
Has it always been easy for you to help people? Or do you find it a struggle, where time, money, and people always seem to thwart your efforts?
Would you like to create the greatest change with the greatest ease? Then start here. Whenever you see possibilities in someone, and feel the desire to help them, first ask "How can I help you?"
Be aware, some people do not desire change, no matter how great your effort. Others may like your help, but not to change, just to fill their need.
This question will enable you to see exactly what people are looking for, so you can help them create the greatest change possible for them at that stage. Continue to ask along the way. You never know, their willingness to receive may change.
Do you have a lot going on? Shopping, cooking, cleaning, kids duties, family duties, work needs, saving the world, and then fall in bed in a heap only to start it all over again in six hours?
How often do you say "I'd love to do that...but I don't have time"?
How many books would you like to read, movies to see, friends to catch up with, hobbies to enjoy, causes to support, projects to start, worlds to save, that you don't do because you "don't have time"?
Have you decided time and space are finite, and you can't change them to suit you?
If you'd like to do more of the things you enjoy in life, rather than having the duties and responsibilities you've decided you have to do to fill up your days, ask "What will it take for me to fold time and space?"
Science questions the bounds of time and space all the time. What if you played with it too?
Right now, get the energy of your life as it is today. What does it smell like, taste like, feel like? What sounds do you hear, what sights do you see, how much do you smile, laugh, and do the things you really love?
Got it? Remember it. Put it in your pocket.
Now ask yourself "If time, money and everyone else's points of view were not real, what would I like the energy of my life to be like?" What would it smell like, taste like, feel like? What sounds would you hear, what sights would you see, how much would you be smiling, laughing, and doing the things you really love? Who would you be in it, where would you be, and what would you be doing?
Got it? Now check the energy of this life, the life you'd like. Is it the same, or different to the energy of the life you have now? If it's different, remember it. Hold it in your hands. Whenever you consider adding something or someone to your life, check its energy, by asking "Is this the energy of the life I'd really like?"
What's your story? You know, the one you tell every time you meet someone new. The one you replay in your head like an old film? How does it go for you? Is it a roll call of well-known schools, colleges, companies, achievements and who you know? Is a tale of woe, misery, and hardship? Are you the victor? Are you the victim? Do you laugh? Do you cry?
Is it real? You point of view creates your reality. So if your point of view is that your story is your life, then it is real.
You are welcome to keep your story if it is working for you. Be aware that if you would like to create change in your life, re-runs of your story will serve only to re-create that life, over and over.
If you'd like to create a different life, you must be willing to give up all your old stories. If so, ask "What if I changed the story of my life?" Then make up something outrageously fun and rewarding to tell. Who know how quickly it could become real?
Do you know people who always try to make you wrong? Who put you down for not being clever enough, fast enough, hard working enough, or just make fun of you to get a laugh?
How do you react? Do you take it on, believe it's true and start to think you are wrong, and feel guilty for not being good enough?
Would you like to stop that now, please?
If so, next time someone tries to make you wrong for something, smile at them, and remind yourself whatever they're saying, or doing has nothing to do with you. Ask silently "Does making other people wrong make you right?"
No. Some people are just mean because it's fun for them.
What if you could see their mean brilliance, without being the effect of it? Would that make your life easier?
Imagine the best thing that could possibly happen to you right now. A better paid job? Any job? More fun people to hang out with? Simply being allowed to visit friends and family? A new car? $2000 suddenly appearing in your bank account? Your loans paid off? A great apartment in a fabulous part of town? A shack at the beach? Ten new clients? Retirement? Finding out you're pregnant? Finding out you're not pregnant? Going on a trip? World peace? An end to poverty and hunger? What else?
Do you dream, hope and fantasise about it? Perhaps you've had a taste and are waiting for the flood gates to open? Or you're wondering why it's taking so long, and that maybe you're not asking enough, or the right questions?
When did you decide that achieving this particular thing was as good as it gets? What if there were something even better that you can't see on your left, simply because you keep looking to your right?
If you'd like to see the sphere of possibilities around you, in all dimensions, ask "What is possible that I can't imagine?"
What makes you angry? Injustice? War? Poverty? Evil? Your partner coming home late from work every night? Your boss or co-workers being stupid and lazy? Your family not being willing to see your point of view about how to make the world a better place? What else?
I'm guessing you'd like to change these things for the better, and you become angry out of frustration, because you think you're supposed to be angry, or from the belief that anger will somehow create the changes you'd like?
Will it? Probably not. Two things that anger will create are: stress and toxicity in your body; and resistance and reaction in other people.
Will either of these things help you make the changes you'd like? No. They might even make it harder.
If you'd like to be free from anger's control, to create what you'd really like, ask "What will anger contribute here?" and then "What else is possible to create the changes I'd like to see?"
What if you could see anger for what it is: a distraction?
Think of something you'd like to change. A relationship, a job, money, body, life situation, society, government? Got it?
How willing are you to do whatever it takes to create that change? A lot? A little?
For example, would you like a constantly fresh relationship with your partner or work, rather than the daily maintenance you currently have? Or a society and government that seems filled with hate, fear and corruption?
If so, every morning wake up and consciously destroy and uncreate the think you'd like to change.
In other words, are you willing to do whatever it takes, including getting divorced, quitting your job, protesting and being fined or arrested?
You may or may not need to follow through. It's the energy or willingness that will clean your slate so you can start the day afresh.
So if you're not seeing the changes you'd like, ask "Am I willing to destroy and uncreate it all?"
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