Are you feeling overwhelmed by things in life that you seem unable to change? If so, ask "What tools can I use to change this?" Start with these basic five.
Remind yourself that
- you're an infinite being with infinite free choice
- everything is just an interesting point of view
- what feels light is right for you
- a choice will always create awareness; so choose, notice what shows up, choose again, repeat
- nothing has to be fixed and you can choose something new every ten seconds, and
- a question will always create more possibilities
How often do you stop yourself from doing something you'd prefer to do, or that you know is the light choice for you? Never, sometimes, or all the time?
When you stop yourself, are you limiting your choices based on what your parents, teachers, religious or other authority figures, friends, or even strangers have decided you should do what they tell you?
If you'd prefer to create your life from unlimited choices, ask "What if I gave myself permission?"
Then you can choose for you. You may still make the same choice your parents/teachers/authority figures/friends/strangers would have had you make. The difference is that you now have access to unlimited possibilities, free from the limitations other people try to impose on you to control you.
After all, who's living your life and who knows what's best for you: them or you?
Do you have people energetically crowding in on you, feeding off your energy like vampires?
Do you find yourself putting up barriers to keep them at bay? Does this tire, even exhaust you?
If you'd like a different experience do this. Whenever you feel claustrophobic, hemmed in on all sides, ask "Am I space?" Then push whatever barriers you've constructed all the way down and expand energetically out in all directions to infinity and beyond, and allow whoever and whatever is crowding in on you all the space they need.
Can vampires hook their teeth into space?
Do you find yourself allowing other people to walk all over you? You're in allowance of all their points of view and judgements, smiling, listening, asking questions.
Perhaps you're hoping that one day they might listen back to you, ask you a question or two, and see your point of view?
The 'oneness' of our infinite free will universe includes everything and judges nothing. This includes meanness, gaslighting, belittling, and a vast array of behaviours you may not find enjoyable, but others do. Oneness also includes infinite choice, including your ability to choose what you enjoy.
So next time you're not enjoying being walked over by meanness, gaslighting, belittling or any other unpleasant behaviour, ask yourself "Am I being a doormat?"
If you sense you are, then remember you can simply smile, walk away, and choose something else.
Have you lived most of your life feeling 'wrong'?
No matter what you do, think, or say, do you judge and censure yourself constantly, trying to figure out whether it's right or wrong?
Are you stuck in a loop of defending against and fighting for things, constructing barriers with others to prove something is right or wrong? Do you tie yourself up in knots making yourself wrong for everything?
If you'd like to step out of this loop, start here. First remind yourself that right and wrong are "interesting points of view" and ask yourself "who do these points of view come from?" about any views you seem stuck on.
When others come to you seeking a fight, say "Yes, you are right..." and when you notice your barriers coming up, ask yourself "What if being wrong was right?"
What change could you create by acknowledging the diversity of points of view? What if there were freedom in being wrong?
Do you live an exuberant life? How many things are you afraid of losing? Are you worried that people won't approve?
What if the only thing you had to lose was your limitation? What could you create then? If you'd like to find out, ask "What if I lived like I had nothing to lose?"
When you ask this and you choose for you, you may find family members, friends, jobs, habits, routines, or any number of things might disappear from your life.
Rather than considering a loss, consider what you've gained. Space, time, energy and you. So now with your gained, space, time, energy and the real you, what will you create? What will you gain?
Then again, you may not lose anything. People and things may adore the your newfound exuberance and multiple.
What's going on that you need to 'make' your day? What if you just 'made it' starting now?
What if you had already 'made it' and you could make some even MORE great stuff? Would you be willing to make more?
So ask, "What if I made my day? What would be the most fun for me to start making now?" then see what shows up and make that.
Then make some more of that. Repeat.
Do you live life to the fullest? Adding more and more and more and MORE, just because it's fun and you can?
Does taking so much on sometimes stress you, but can't stop because you feel you''d let everybody down? Have you decided that you have to keep going, no matter what?
If so, and you'd like to create a little more ease for yourself, ask "What if taking a break was OK?"
What if by taking a break, you created the space you required for something even greater to show up, for everyone?
Do you ever find yourself surrounded by meanness or superiority? Maybe you only have one such person in your life, who is constantly tearing you down.
Do you find it easy to stand up for yourself? How willing are you to speak out about what's true for you? Are you always being nice?
If you'd like to change the meanness in your world, or find greater ease in speaking out about what you believe in, ask "What's the value of being nice?"
When did you buy the idea that 'being nice' was desirable above all else, even if it meant suppressing you? What if silence was simply a choice you made when you weren't willing to stand up with courage for what you knew to be true for you? What if you made another choice?
Where have you been unwilling to speak up for what you know, for who you are, and for what is valuable to you? Where do you allow a few or even one voice to dominate you?
Are you willing to see that your voice has value, credence and potency to create change beyond anything you've ever imagined possible?
Has someone ever called you crazy or suggested that you might be from another planet? How did you respond? Did you smile and think "ah ha...you have no idea...." Or did you automatically go into the wrongness of you, work extra hard to try and fit in, and lock down your 'craziness'?
Do some people define you as crazy for trying to go beyond the bounds of their reality, while others define you as crazy for trying to fit in? Are you trapped in resistance and reaction to what people think?
What could be possible if you rethought your definitions and stopped assuming that normality was always good, and abnormality was always bad? History repeatedly shows us that people with abnormal minds can solve abnormal problems. What if your 'craziness' was the gift the world required? Would you call that 'good'?
So next time someone's hinting you're a little bit nuts, ask yourself, "What if I was crazy good?"
When you meet people for the first time, what do you tell them about you? Do you have a set patter about who you are, what you do, what your title or business is, what the main challenges of your life are, and who else is in your life?
Do you enjoy these conversations? Are they spontaneous and fun? Or are they boring and predictable?
Do you find people really listen to them? Or do most people simply wait for a pause in your story to launch their own? How well do you listen to theirs?
How much of telling and retelling your story cements it into place? With each retelling, does it become easier for you to create the changes you'd like, or harder?
If you'd like something different, ask "What if my life had no story?"
What if you woke up every morning like Drew Barrymore in the movie 50 First Dates, with a totally fresh start? Like to play? Then for the next month, whenever you meet someone new, begin by asking them questions until they ask about you.
Only then tell something you have never said before, even it it's not yet true. Go on, create your story.
How much stress do you normally experience when you spend time with your family, in-laws, or co-workers who are on a different wavelength to you? Have you got relatives who give you a hard time? Maybe you married the favourite cousin and you're 'not good enough'? Do some of them think it's 'fun' to laugh at your views on life? Or perhaps they're just plain mean ELFs who know you're an easy mark?
If you dread family, workplace or other gatherings with people who are not in your zone, try these games and create a difference.
Enjoy the Silly Season.
Have you recently made a career change? Did you realise your job wasn't working for you and quit? Perhaps you had a more rewarding offer and moved on? Or did controversy or other external factors force you to change?
Are you at ease with the change, or conflicted? Are you enjoying your new life completely? Or do you miss elements of your former career and remain energetically connected?
Are you struggling to know who you are without your former identity?
Do you think that change means you need to leave everything about the former you behind? Even if you were forced to leave your career defamed and vilified, regardless of the amazing contribution you had made, what if you didn't need to cut it off and make it wrong?
If you'd like greater ease with your changes, ask "What can I use this as a springboard for, to create something even greater?"
What if you considered your career change a gift that created the space for even more of you to show up?
Do you worry about what might go wrong? Is fear keeping you trapped? Are you anxious for no apparent reason?
Do you feel frozen by these emotions and incapable of happiness? What's the value of operating from worry, anxiety and fear? What if happiness were just a choice?
If you'd like a change, ask "What if I lived my life from the excitement of what could go right, rather than the fear of what could go wrong?" Perhaps you've misidentified excitement as fear? Or maybe you're distracted by implants that are not really yours? In both cases, acknowledge it and demand change.
And if you enjoy the news, talkback radio, other mainstream media programs and most people's conversations, consider repeating "interesting point of view" for everything you see, hear or read.
How much of your worry, fear, and anxiety is you being a highly attuned WiFi device, receiving all the thoughts, feelings, and emotions of everyone around you and busing them as yours? Would you "return to sender with consciousness" please?
Do you spend a lot of time feeling wrong? Do friends, family, and even passing strangers seem compelled to tell you that you haven't got it quite (or a lot) right, and if you just did it their way, your life would be a whole lot better?
Do you agree with, or fight against them? Is that fun and does it make you smile? If not, and you'd prefer more joy, ask "Am I willing to step into my life?"
What if you weren't trapped in the narrow band of other people's possibilities? What's the narrow band? Where you either agree and align and do what they tell you, or resist and react and do the opposite.
When you expand beyond this band of polarity, and create your life from what you know works for you, you have infinite possibilities. When people tell you you're wrong, smile and say "You're right. Thank you so much! You really have helped me to step into my life."
Then change the subject or walk away, 'returning to sender' any lingering feeling of wrongness, and do what you know works for you.
Do you have a nagging ache, pain, sadness, or other uncomfortable physical sensation?
Have you tried all the usual things and yet it lingers? For example, have you asked "Who does this belong to?" and returning to sender when you become aware it's not yours? Or asking "Body, what are you telling me?" and following body's lead?
If so, and you still have the ache, ask "Who or what am I unwilling to lose?"
Notice if you recall any event or person from your life now, or in the past. Have you locked into your body something that you decided you can't let go, even though it's hurtful or toxic? Are you re-running an event in your body over and over, saying "If only I'd done this, it would have turned out better"? Or perhaps you're exhausting yourself with the dream that someone will change into the person you know they could be if they chose it, but instead you let them drive the knife in deeper?
What if your willingness to let go of all the events and people you've locked into your body over your lifetime alleviated your niggling aches, pains, sadness, longings, or other chronic conditions? What space and ease would that create for you?
Have you ever lamented "I don't belong!" or spent your life trying to fit in with others around you? Has it been easy?
Perhaps you've always know you were different and found it simpler, and more fun, to hang out by yourself, doing your own thing? Did you nevertheless feel a nagging pressure to belong, or believe that you were somehow wrong for not fitting in?
What if there was nothing wrong with not belonging?
Did you know the definition of belong includes: to be the property of, to be part of, and to be suitable for something? Is that what you're looking for?
If you'd like clarity about this, ask "What's the value of wanting to belong?" Perhaps your inability or non-desire to 'belong' was simply your awareness that you were already, wholly, and suitably the property of something: YOU.
So what if rather than 'longing to be' something else, you embraced being all of who you are already?
Do you have something in your life that you'd like to change, but haven't yet because you fear you might lose family, friends, work, money, status, reputation or everything you've 'worked so hard to achieve'?
Does this fear keep you frozen and trapped by inaction?
Would you like to thaw, expand outward and move into action? If so, ask "What if the only thing I had to lose was my limitation?"
What if by making the changes you know you'd really like, you created more than you could ever imagine? What if this also contributed to everyone and everything around you?
Certainly, some friends, family, professional and other acquaintances will not accept the changes you make and withdraw from your life. Would that be a loss, or a contribution? What's the difference? Only your point of view.
Have you ever tried to change something in your life continually, but to no effect even though you've asked a thousand genuine questions?
For example, has someone ever told you that you weren't good enough and you should try even harder? Or that something about you was not appropriate and you had to overcome it? Perhaps you're too vocal, disruptive, creative, poor, uneducated, powerless, unattractive, or have some other failing?
What if in fact, there was nothing wrong with you? What if you have been buying into a lie that someone else wanted to you to believe?
Is it possible to overcome, change or clear something that doesn't exist? What would you do if someone told you you were a rabbit? Would you believe them and work feverishly to change out of being a rabbit? Or would you say "Um, huh?" I'm not a rabbit. I'm me!" and get on with enjoying your life?
So if you'd like to create greater ease around things you have assumed were 'wrong' about you, and that you should change but so far haven't been able to, ask "What am I trying to clear that isn't true?"
If something's not true to start with, how can you clear it? Simply recognise the lie and it can no longer exist.
Are you a worrier? What do you worry about? Failing exams, business, relationships, children, money, saving the world? Something else?
When you're worrying do you spend most of the time focused on what you're creating, or are you trying to figure out what other people want from you, and how to deliver it?
What's the value of worry? Does it contribute to anything? Or does it keep you trapped in reaction and distract you from taking action? Is it an excuse for no-action? How relevant is it to what you're looking to create?
If you'd like to be free to take action and create the life you'd prefer, ask "What if worry wasn't relevant?"
How much of your worry stems from trying to fit in, or to meet other people's expectations? Do you think it's caring? How aware of, or interested in you are other people? A lot, a little or not at all? Would you like to have more fun? Then stop worrying about what other people want from you and start creating your life for you.
If your life was an adventure of constant creation, would worry exist?
Have you grown up thinking you needed to make a decision and stick to it? That you had to figure out the right way to live and abide by that?
Do you get confused by apparently differing advice? For example, to pay for things you love with a generosity of spirit on one hand, while asking how you can use people and things to your advantage on the other?
Is life always the same? Are people consistent? How often have you been disappointed when people and situations didn't meet your expectations?
If you'd like to create your life, rather than react to its inconsistencies, ask "What if I didn't need to be consistent?"
What if instead of trying to figure out a fool-proof method of living your life on autopilot, you stayed fully alert to all the possibilities in each moment of your life, and chose the approach that best suited you in that moment?
You will probably appear inconsistent to everyone else. Does that matter? Only if you want a life like everyone else's.
Are you nearing rock bottom when it comes to money? Has your successful business started to nose dive? Are you in a pattern of making money when you need it, then spending it or giving it all away when it reaches a certain limit so you have to start again?
If so, and you'd like to change it, ask "What am I bankrupting myself about to force myself to do?"
If time, money and other people's point of view were not real, what would you do because you love it? What talent and ability are you keeping hidden that if you shared it, others would pay you huge amounts for? What are you denying that you would rather be doing?
What if you didn't need to bankrupt yourself to force you into creation? What if you simply choose creation? And what if you kept creating — even if you had hideous amounts of money — because it was fun and you could create more and intive others to join in? What if that was the point of money?
How often have you said "If only I had the money?"
Right now, ask yourself "What am I saying 'If only I had the money' about?" Would you buy something? Travel somewhere? Take a break? Study something? Move house? Change jobs? Make new friends? Have children? Feel less stressed? Be happier? Save the world?
Do you consider that money is the solution to your situation, problems, dissatisfaction, unhappiness in life?
Is it really? If money were the solution, then how is it that rich people have all the same complaints, problems, dissatisfaction and unhappiness in their lives as you?
If you'd like to free yourself from this distraction, ask "What if money weren't the solution?"
Once you free your attention from money, ask "What could I be, do, have, create differently that would contribute to the life I'd really like?"
What if YOU were always the solution, and just hadn't realised it?
How often do you say 'because' every day? For example: I can't come tonight because [I have to work late]; I have to work late because [it's a job and better than nothing]; I'd love to do something else more fun for work, but I can't because [add your reason here].
Are the things you say after 'because' real? Or are they simply all your reasons and justifications for not doing something? When you really want something, do you find a way to create it, no matter what it takes?
If you'd like to create more of what you'd really like in life, notice every time you say 'because' and ask "What's possible that I haven't considered?"
You're not wrong when you say 'because.' If fact, you're absolutely right and that's what you'll create.
If you'd like something more than you currently have, questions will open your eyes and show you what else is possible. Then you can create it, if you choose.
Do you find yourself doing things you'd rather not? Sometimes even doing things you know are not good for you?
Do you do them because you've been told that not to do them would be shameful, that you'd be guilty of causing harm to others, or that you'd regret not doing them?
Are shame, guilt, and regret real and true? Or are they simply interesting points of view based on someone's view of right and wrong? Words designed to control you and coerce you into doing what other people want, while distracting you from creating the life you'd really like?
Other people will always try to get you to do stuff their way, using words to trick you into believing it's good for you.
If you'd like to be free from the control of distractors like this, ask "Is the thought of shame, guilt or regret distracting me from creating the life I'd truly like?" Then see how light you feel.
You may end up choosing to do exactly the same thing, but not because someone tricked you into it. It will be your free and conscious choice.
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