Do you live life to the fullest? Adding more and more and more and MORE, just because it's fun and you can?
Does taking so much on sometimes stress you, but can't stop because you feel you''d let everybody down? Have you decided that you have to keep going, no matter what?
If so, and you'd like to create a little more ease for yourself, ask "What if taking a break was OK?"
What if by taking a break, you created the space you required for something even greater to show up, for everyone?
Do you ever find yourself surrounded by meanness or superiority? Maybe you only have one such person in your life, who is constantly tearing you down.
Do you find it easy to stand up for yourself? How willing are you to speak out about what's true for you? Are you always being nice?
If you'd like to change the meanness in your world, or find greater ease in speaking out about what you believe in, ask "What's the value of being nice?"
When did you buy the idea that 'being nice' was desirable above all else, even if it meant suppressing you? What if silence was simply a choice you made when you weren't willing to stand up with courage for what you knew to be true for you? What if you made another choice?
Where have you been unwilling to speak up for what you know, for who you are, and for what is valuable to you? Where do you allow a few or even one voice to dominate you?
Are you willing to see that your voice has value, credence and potency to create change beyond anything you've ever imagined possible?
Has someone ever called you crazy or suggested that you might be from another planet? How did you respond? Did you smile and think "ah ha...you have no idea...." Or did you automatically go into the wrongness of you, work extra hard to try and fit in, and lock down your 'craziness'?
Do some people define you as crazy for trying to go beyond the bounds of their reality, while others define you as crazy for trying to fit in? Are you trapped in resistance and reaction to what people think?
What could be possible if you rethought your definitions and stopped assuming that normality was always good, and abnormality was always bad? History repeatedly shows us that people with abnormal minds can solve abnormal problems. What if your 'craziness' was the gift the world required? Would you call that 'good'?
So next time someone's hinting you're a little bit nuts, ask yourself, "What if I was crazy good?"
Have you been shopping recently? Was it fun? Or did you get upset because you lost something, like a credit card, wallet or phone? Were you overcharged? Did you miss out on a car park or a bargain? Did your children have a meltdown? Did you leave feeling stressed and penniless?
If your experience was less than joyful, and you'd like to change your shopping (or any other) experience, ask "Is this mine, or someone else's?"
Thoughts, feelings and emotions are transmitted invisibly and soundlessly like WiFi through everyone nearby. So if you're in the middle of a shopping centre filled with overworked, underpaid, stressed, unhappy people on a budget trying to buy a 'festive season,' be aware that you may pick up all their thoughts, feelings and emotions — even if financially you're comfortable and enjoy your work — and walk out feeling unhappy and overspent.
Even if something does 'go wrong' and you lose something, ask "What's right about this I'm not getting?" and "How does it get any better than this?" smile and keep moving.
Do you have any stiffness in your body? In your neck, shoulders, spine, knees, wrists, or hands? Anywhere else?
Have you put it down to the natural ageing process, repetitive strain injury, sitting or standing too long in one position, or lack of certain vitamins or minerals?
Do you expect that as you grow older your body will stiffen and eventually seize up? If these are your points of view, then you are not wrong.
What if there were a different possibility? What about those spritely seniors who roller blade like teenagers, ride horses like cowboys, or dance like Latin lovers?
What makes them so different? Could it simply be their points of view? If you'd like to find out, ask "What fixed points of view am I unwilling to let go?"
How many layers of fixed points of view have you locked into your body and made so real that your body has lost its flexibility? What physical changes could you create with your body, simply by being willing to be "interesting point of view"?
When you meet people for the first time, what do you tell them about you? Do you have a set patter about who you are, what you do, what your title or business is, what the main challenges of your life are, and who else is in your life?
Do you enjoy these conversations? Are they spontaneous and fun? Or are they boring and predictable?
Do you find people really listen to them? Or do most people simply wait for a pause in your story to launch their own? How well do you listen to theirs?
How much of telling and retelling your story cements it into place? With each retelling, does it become easier for you to create the changes you'd like, or harder?
If you'd like something different, ask "What if my life had no story?"
What if you woke up every morning like Drew Barrymore in the movie 50 First Dates, with a totally fresh start? Like to play? Then for the next month, whenever you meet someone new, begin by asking them questions until they ask about you.
Only then tell something you have never said before, even it it's not yet true. Go on, create your story.
How much stress do you normally experience when you spend time with your family, in-laws, or co-workers who are on a different wavelength to you? Have you got relatives who give you a hard time? Maybe you married the favourite cousin and you're 'not good enough'? Do some of them think it's 'fun' to laugh at your views on life? Or perhaps they're just plain mean ELFs who know you're an easy mark?
If you dread family, workplace or other gatherings with people who are not in your zone, try these games and create a difference.
Enjoy the Silly Season.
Do you consider change hard?
You know you're not entirely (or at all) satisfied with your work, business, relationships, health, body, or life in general, and you have an idea about what you'd prefer, and yet you can't seem to make it happen?
Do you hear yourself saying "I'd like to do this, but I can't because..."? How many reasons and justifications do you have as to why your current situation, although not ideal, is easier to have than making waves and changing anything?
What if change wasn't the hard part? If you'd like to find out what might open a door to greater possibilities, ask "Am I willing to acknowledge what I've chosen?"
What if the hard part was acknowledging that everything you have created as your life until now had been your choice? There is no need to make it significant. Simply notice it and acknowledge that you are a magnificent creator.
Now what do you choose to create? The same, or different?
Do you strive for completion? Do you value having goals and focus your energy on achieving those? How do you feel when either you reach, or don't reach your goal? Does procrastination distract you along the way? Is the process fun?
If striving for completion does not give you the sense of fulfilment and satisfaction you were hoping for, and procrastination distracts you, ask "Having done this, what can I create from here?"
What if nothing was ever a completion? What if you considered your work, business and your life in general an ongoing creation, of which you were fully present and created elegantly and joyfully?
Elegance is the greatest result with the least effort. You create elegance when you are fully present and choose consciously and continuously. And procrastination? This often occurs when you have concluded something is a necessity, ignoring your awareness and without asking a question.
What if it were all just choice?
Have you recently made a career change? Did you realise your job wasn't working for you and quit? Perhaps you had a more rewarding offer and moved on? Or did controversy or other external factors force you to change?
Are you at ease with the change, or conflicted? Are you enjoying your new life completely? Or do you miss elements of your former career and remain energetically connected?
Are you struggling to know who you are without your former identity?
Do you think that change means you need to leave everything about the former you behind? Even if you were forced to leave your career defamed and vilified, regardless of the amazing contribution you had made, what if you didn't need to cut it off and make it wrong?
If you'd like greater ease with your changes, ask "What can I use this as a springboard for, to create something even greater?"
What if you considered your career change a gift that created the space for even more of you to show up?
Do you worry about what might go wrong? Is fear keeping you trapped? Are you anxious for no apparent reason?
Do you feel frozen by these emotions and incapable of happiness? What's the value of operating from worry, anxiety and fear? What if happiness were just a choice?
If you'd like a change, ask "What if I lived my life from the excitement of what could go right, rather than the fear of what could go wrong?" Perhaps you've misidentified excitement as fear? Or maybe you're distracted by implants that are not really yours? In both cases, acknowledge it and demand change.
And if you enjoy the news, talkback radio, other mainstream media programs and most people's conversations, consider repeating "interesting point of view" for everything you see, hear or read.
How much of your worry, fear, and anxiety is you being a highly attuned WiFi device, receiving all the thoughts, feelings, and emotions of everyone around you and busing them as yours? Would you "return to sender with consciousness" please?
How often can you see everything in someone else's universe? You know exactly what they could do different, that if they chose it would create change beyond their imagination?
How many times have you tried to tell, show, coax, persuade, debate, argue, or fight to share your awareness, trying to help them see it, and then choose it? How often has that worked? Always, sometimes, or almost never?
If you'd like an easier approach with more dynamic results, ask yourself "What question could I ask here that would lead to the awareness that will create the greatest change?"
Then putting aside your hopes and dreams about the change you know is possible, ask the question that comes to mind. It might appear to have nothing to do with the 'issue'. It might be as seemingly unrelated as "Are you looking to change something? If so, just ask and I'll do what I can to help."
Then smile and wait until they ask you. Are you willing to wait?
How's your sex life? Existent? Non-existent? Is it easy and fun? Is it full of strife and trouble? Or somewhere in between on auto-pilot?
How do you choose who you'll have sex with? Do you base it on body type? Personality traits? Future financial potentials? Or your inner monologue of "Thank you, thank you, thank you for having sex with me, no matter what you are!"?
Would you like to create something different? If so, next time you meet someone you or your body responds to with that panting energy, ask "Will it be easy? Will it be fun? And will I learn something?"
You may not get a 'yes' on all three and yet still choose to go ahead. No worries. If it's easy and fun, how does it get any better? If you only get that you'll learn something, you may want to ask more questions, like "How does it get any better than this?" and "What else is possible?"
If you get none, you may want to smile and walk away.
Are you distracted by competition? Focused on how to out-smart, out-do, out-strip someone else in your field?
Perhaps someone is selling an idea they stole from you as theirs and you're trying to figure out how to beat them? Or do you consider that someone else will always be greater than you and at least you should strive to be more like them?
How expansive does competition with someone else feel? When you enter into competition with someone, even if they are the 'leader' in your field, does this create the space for you to be as great as you are? Or does it keep you locked into the limitations of whatever they're willing to, or telling you their willing to create?
Can you truly compete with anyone else? No. How can an apple complete with a nightingale? So if you'd like to step into your life and out of the limited band of competition with others, ask "How can I out-create me, beyond what exists and anything anyone has considered before?"
Are you willing to expand and create your life beyond what others can imagine? It might be a whole lot more fun too.
Do you spend a lot of time feeling wrong? Do friends, family, and even passing strangers seem compelled to tell you that you haven't got it quite (or a lot) right, and if you just did it their way, your life would be a whole lot better?
Do you agree with, or fight against them? Is that fun and does it make you smile? If not, and you'd prefer more joy, ask "Am I willing to step into my life?"
What if you weren't trapped in the narrow band of other people's possibilities? What's the narrow band? Where you either agree and align and do what they tell you, or resist and react and do the opposite.
When you expand beyond this band of polarity, and create your life from what you know works for you, you have infinite possibilities. When people tell you you're wrong, smile and say "You're right. Thank you so much! You really have helped me to step into my life."
Then change the subject or walk away, 'returning to sender' any lingering feeling of wrongness, and do what you know works for you.
How often do you get into upsets with friends, or are hurt by the things they say or do? Rarely, a lot, or all the time?
What is a friend? Someone who enjoys you in total allowance? Someone who acknowledges you just as you are and all the crazy choices you might make, without judgement? Someone who is fun to hang out with and adds to your life, and is grateful to you for adding to theirs. Do you have anyone in your life like that right now?
Next time you experience upset, hurt, anger, or have some other uncomfortable sensation in relation to a 'friend', ask yourself "Is this person really my friend?" What's light is right for you, remember.
If you notice your current friends spend most of their time telling you how you're wrong and should change because they 'care about you,' ask them "Would you like to be my friend? Then you need to stop judging me. If not, that's ok. I'll miss you and hope you have a great life." Then smile and walk away knowing you've just created a great space for new friends to walk into.
And if you do find yourself without friends, start with one: you. Are you willing to be your best friend? What if your energy of space and allowance was the invitation for others like that to find you and ask to play?
Do you know what makes you happy? How many conclusions do you have about what brings you happiness? One or two? A few hundred?
What are they? For example, are you working toward something? An exam or job interview you'd like to pass? A girl or boy you'd like to date, marry or have kids with? A computer, TV, car, or house you'd like to buy? A project or cause you're fighting for? Or some sort of mental, emotional, or physical relief you're seeking? Do you consider that when you achieve that target you'll be happy?
Not sure? If you'd like clarity, ask "Does this really create happiness for me?" Then notice how you feel. Light or heavy? What is true for you feels light. So if you sense heaviness, you may have bought the idea from someone else (your family?) their idea of happiness, which might not suit you.
There's nothing wrong with seeking more in life and being joyful with the results. What if you could be joyful every day of the process too? What might your results look like then?
Do you like routine? Is that what you strive to achieve? Something comfortable, known and secure? How often do you say "Once I get a system set up, a process in place, everything will be better?"
There's nothing wrong with comfortable, known and routine, when everything in your life is even better than you could imagine.
What about when something is not working the way you'd like? Will comfortable, known and routine create the changes you'd like? Or will they set in concrete what's not working?
So if you're looking for dynamic change, ask "What could I be or do different today that would help create the life, living and reality I'd really like?" Then notice what comes to mind, and be or do that.
'Different' is not the same as 'differently.' Differently is doing the same thing in different ways. Different is outside anything you have ever considered.
What have you not yet imagined that, if you chose it, would contribute to your life? Don't know? Just ask.
Are you surrounded by people telling you what is true, what is fake, and what you should stake your life on?
Do you have family, friends, experts and random strangers standing on 360 degrees of any particular issue, presenting you with a dizzying array of information and persuasive propositions? Does any of that help? Or do you feel more confused and hemmed into a reality that doesn't feel quite right?
If you'd like to create space and ease when you're being bombarded by so many points of view, ask yourself about each one as it is presented to you "Is this light for me?" You know the breezy sense of space and weightlessness you have when everything is just right, and not the heavy, clunky feeling when something is not quite right and you sense a lie.
In other words, if you feel light, it's right for you. If you feel heavy it's not right for you.
What if none of these people were wrong? What if each of their points of view were 100% correct...for them? Just because something is right for someone else, doesn't mean it's right for you.
Do you have a nagging ache, pain, sadness, or other uncomfortable physical sensation?
Have you tried all the usual things and yet it lingers? For example, have you asked "Who does this belong to?" and returning to sender when you become aware it's not yours? Or asking "Body, what are you telling me?" and following body's lead?
If so, and you still have the ache, ask "Who or what am I unwilling to lose?"
Notice if you recall any event or person from your life now, or in the past. Have you locked into your body something that you decided you can't let go, even though it's hurtful or toxic? Are you re-running an event in your body over and over, saying "If only I'd done this, it would have turned out better"? Or perhaps you're exhausting yourself with the dream that someone will change into the person you know they could be if they chose it, but instead you let them drive the knife in deeper?
What if your willingness to let go of all the events and people you've locked into your body over your lifetime alleviated your niggling aches, pains, sadness, longings, or other chronic conditions? What space and ease would that create for you?
Have you ever lamented "I don't belong!" or spent your life trying to fit in with others around you? Has it been easy?
Perhaps you've always know you were different and found it simpler, and more fun, to hang out by yourself, doing your own thing? Did you nevertheless feel a nagging pressure to belong, or believe that you were somehow wrong for not fitting in?
What if there was nothing wrong with not belonging?
Did you know the definition of belong includes: to be the property of, to be part of, and to be suitable for something? Is that what you're looking for?
If you'd like clarity about this, ask "What's the value of wanting to belong?" Perhaps your inability or non-desire to 'belong' was simply your awareness that you were already, wholly, and suitably the property of something: YOU.
So what if rather than 'longing to be' something else, you embraced being all of who you are already?
Do you have something in your life that you'd like to change, but haven't yet because you fear you might lose family, friends, work, money, status, reputation or everything you've 'worked so hard to achieve'?
Does this fear keep you frozen and trapped by inaction?
Would you like to thaw, expand outward and move into action? If so, ask "What if the only thing I had to lose was my limitation?"
What if by making the changes you know you'd really like, you created more than you could ever imagine? What if this also contributed to everyone and everything around you?
Certainly, some friends, family, professional and other acquaintances will not accept the changes you make and withdraw from your life. Would that be a loss, or a contribution? What's the difference? Only your point of view.
Have you ever tried to change something in your life continually, but to no effect even though you've asked a thousand genuine questions?
For example, has someone ever told you that you weren't good enough and you should try even harder? Or that something about you was not appropriate and you had to overcome it? Perhaps you're too vocal, disruptive, creative, poor, uneducated, powerless, unattractive, or have some other failing?
What if in fact, there was nothing wrong with you? What if you have been buying into a lie that someone else wanted to you to believe?
Is it possible to overcome, change or clear something that doesn't exist? What would you do if someone told you you were a rabbit? Would you believe them and work feverishly to change out of being a rabbit? Or would you say "Um, huh?" I'm not a rabbit. I'm me!" and get on with enjoying your life?
So if you'd like to create greater ease around things you have assumed were 'wrong' about you, and that you should change but so far haven't been able to, ask "What am I trying to clear that isn't true?"
If something's not true to start with, how can you clear it? Simply recognise the lie and it can no longer exist.
Do you assume you have to eat when you feel hungry? Most people do. Do you feel compelled to preempt hunger pangs by filling up at regular intervals?
How's your relationship with your body? Comfortable, or not so much? Do you sense your body is telling you something?
If you'd like to create greater ease with your body, rather than filling it up with food on auto-pilot 3-6 times a day, wait until you notice you're hungry, then ask "Body, what are you hungry for?"
Certainly, your body may require food. In which case, then ask "Body, what would you like to eat?" and notice what comes to mind, or what menu item your eye is drawn to first.
Or, your body might be hungry for something else, like movement, rest, warmth, cool, attention, relief, nurturing, sex, touch, change or a myriad of things you won't know until you ask. So ask it and see what comes to mind.
What if hunger pains were your body enjoying and adjusting to the extra space, like a sigh of relief from the density of the food it didn't really desire?
Are you surprised or frustrated when people don't listen? How often have you tried to share with your family and friends the amazing things you've spent your time and money learning, only to be disappointed by their lack on interest?
At best, do they smile and nod with glazed eyes and closed ears? At worst do they berate you for wasting your time and money and end their tirade by reminding you that you're stupid?
Does this upset you? Do you try harder, or start a debate (um, fight)? Does talking more, longer, or harder ever work at all?
What if you could share your insights without saying a word? If you'd like to find out, ask "What if saying nothing was the greatest contribution I could be?" Then shut up, nod, smile, listen and ask questions.
It may take only a few minutes — or it may take decades, or indeed a lifetime — for the other person to stop talking and say "You're different. What is that?"
And that's your invitaiton to talk.
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